Your Story of My Life Journal, how it’s different, and how it’s designed to help

I found it challenging at first to describe what I was working on when I told people of the Story of My Life Journal.

Was it a goalsetting journal? Well, yes, but not JUST that. Was it a book? Yes, but not really.

It became clearer the more it developed, and I can now tell you it’s a guide, of sorts – both journal and book.

About two thirds has an activity/engagement aspect – it’s a goalsetting journal – while the first third is more book than journal, even though it contains the most important exercises you’ll complete.

The ‘why’ behind the ‘what’

It turned out that way for a simple reason: I’m a firm believer that knowing the ‘why’ behind something is the biggest motivational driver for our commitment to that thing.

This was the topic of Simon Sinek’s popular ‘Start with Why’ TEDx talk.

In this case, that ‘thing’ is you and the ways in which you view and act in the world. The ‘why’ is the mechanism that underpins that viewing and acting.

Your Story of My Life Journal is absolutely a goalsetting journal, equipped with tools designed to support you in discovering who you are, what you’re truly passionate about, where you want to go, and how you want to get there.

But I don’t believe tools alone are good enough. You can use a tool, sure, but you need to WANT to use it to get the most out of it.

It’s like this: imagine someone gives you a hammer without explanation, leaving you holding a tool you’ve never seen before – you don’t know what it is and, therefore, believe you have no use for it. You place little value on it and have even less motivation and commitment to use it.

A little while later, you have a need to connect two pieces of wood together, and, after searching YouTube for an instructional video, you see the presenter using something called a hammer. It’s a breakthrough moment. Oh, that thing sitting in a box of other things in your shed is called a hammer! And it turns out it’s actually a highly valuable tool designed to help you achieve your goal.

Nothing about the hammer changed. What changed was your understanding of the hammer.

What changed was your perception.

That understanding alone was enough to turn it from ‘low-value, irrelevant thing’, to ‘invaluable, goal-achieving tool’.

So, your Story of My Life Journal provides you with the tools, but it also provides you with understanding – not just of HOW to use those tools, but WHAT they help you achieve, and WHY you want to use them.

The story of your life

Your Story of My Life Journal seeks to achieve this by helping you work with the platform of stories embedded deep within your psyche.

People evolved to interpret the world through stories, and our state of being is dependent on the stories we tell (Peterson, 1999).

The dual hemispheric structure of our brains is an example of that evolution, with the left hemisphere specialising in that which is known and routinised, and the right more capable of abstract thought, allowing us to integrate new information as we encounter the unknown (Goldberg, 1994).

We integrate the unknown through stories, using metaphors and narrative to explain experiences to ourselves and others.

The unknown can be thought of as “chaos” and the known as “order”, and the interaction between the two is the plot of every story human beings have ever told: there is order, then chaos, then an order that is rebuilt by a hero into something generally better than the original state.

We are gripped by those stories – we find them so engrossing and meaningful, we pay to watch, hear, and read them – because understanding how to interact with the unknown has been critical to our survival.

Not only that, but the hemispheric design of our brains and the ways in which we absorb new information shows that our bodies have evolved to recognise, interpret, and tell stories.

That is quite significant, because evolution is a conservative beast: anything that exists, does so for good reason and to ensure survival.

So, we don’t evolve to include an ability to recognise, interpret, and tell stories unless that ability is fundamental to our survival in the world. Unless that ability reflects a reality. Why would your brain evolve to see the world that way, unless the world actually is that way?

You see the world as chaos/unknown, order/known, because you are designed to do so.

Chaos and order appear to you as a fundamental reality of the universe. Or, maybe, because it’s a fundamental reality, you evolved to see it.

It really is a chicken-and-egg dilemma.

Either way, you process your way through the world, mediating between the two forces, using stories.

Every story has its beginning

Those stories are at your core – they are your values and enduring beliefs – and your Story of My Life Journal is designed to help you understand them, so you can start telling the stories you choose for yourself.

It will help you identify your values and what truly matters to you deep within your core, then it will help you establish goals aligned to those values, and it will assist you in developing a plan to work towards those goals.

It is a process that underpins meaning and purpose.

With any luck, happiness and productivity will be an added benefit.

One important note …

Story of My Life employs an extensive array of psychology tools, processes, and concepts, but it was not compiled by psychologists.

The psycho-physiological benefits of values-aligned goalsetting are well documented (Moore, 2018) and can have a profoundly positive impact on your mental wellbeing. And journaling is often used in approaches such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy to treat anxiety and depression (Riopel, 2020).

However, this journal is not a treatment for clinical conditions.

If you are experiencing challenges in your life that you feel are beyond your control, please consult a doctor or the most appropriate health care practitioner, or contact a support service (such as Australia’s Lifeline).